I’ve had some tough days lately and I know that I need to be better about starting my day more intentionally. There are too many unknown variables in my life to enable me to count on a good start. If I want a good start, I have to make it happen. My kids could wake up sick, or really early, or in a bad mood. And as for the rest of my day? . . . I can count on both tough and magical moments throughout the day, every day. Some days, I let the tough moments overwhelm me and I’m not even sure that I see the magical moments at all.
I want to change this. I want to be better equipped to deal with the tough and focus on the magic.
Like these two moments –
Fleet woke me up this morning saying, “Mommy, my hand is asleep and it feels all tingly like it has ‘the force.'” (Star Wars reference!) You just can’t be mad when you get woken up like this, even if it is 6 am and they didn’t go to bed until 10pm the night before.
I took both boys with me to the doctor yesterday. I wanted to prepare them for what might go on at this appointment. I asked them if they remember where babies come out of your body. Luke says, “from your china.” I almost corrected him until I realized that the was just trying to say vagina.
MORE FOCUS ON THIS!
Before I got pregnant, I was waking up at 5am several mornings a week and heading to the gym. I thought this would be hard for me as I’m not an early riser. Surprisingly, it wasn’t. It felt so great to start my day this way that waking up was no trouble. I came home ready to tackle the day.
Then I was pregnant and first trimesters for me are pretty awful. Once I stopped that routine, it was hard to pick back up. Now, between needing to pee every 10 minutes and being tired, I’m so preggers that there is no way I am hitting the gym at 5am.
So, what can I do to start out on a positive note?
After a tough day on Tuesday, I decided to wake up early and golf cart over to the park. I listened to a podcast (loving Meditation Minis!) and the calm meditation station on Pandora all while staring at God’s beautiful creation. I literally counted my blessings. Being grateful has to be the key to happiness. I mentally prepared for my day and gave myself some pep talks for those tough moments. I came home ready to love on my family.
As a parent, when you need time to yourself to recharge, you have to plan it. Spontaneous self care is not possible in parenthood. And when you need your spouse to help make it happen, ask him/her. It’s a two way street and I bet they’d be happy to oblige.
I had to look for a realistic way to make this time happen for myself. Once the kids are up, I can’t leave my husband with everyone and head out for some “me time” every morning. I want to enjoy this time and not feel like I need to rush back so waking up early is the best option. And some days, I bet I will be taking a person or two with me to the park. And I’m going to be okay with that. (I’m trying to work on my expectations?!)
I’m on day five of starting my day by myself, reflecting. The first two days I was such a mess that I spent the entire time repeating mantra’s to myself like, “The next 5 weeks might just suck but you can deal with it. You’ve survived it three times before and you will again. You are crazy strong.” Clearly, I really needed this time! By the third day, I was feeling so much better that I was able to just enjoy the beautiful scenery, feel grateful for my pregnancy and my family and get lost in my thoughts a little bit . . .
I stared at the ocean, listened to the waves, watched a bird chase an insect. I realize that this all sounds a bit cheesy but my days are SO bananas that noticing and appreciating these small things is a welcome respite for my busy mind.
If you’re like me and your days are full, I encourage you to find a way to start your day intentionally. Whether it’s yoga, meditation, journaling, prayer or reading from an uplifting book, it might just change your life.
Right now, while my kids are so little, my world and their worlds are so intertwined. It won’t always be this way. Doing this for myself, is good for all of us both now and in the long run.